Posted by: Lisa | June 22, 2009

The WIC Dilemma

As a wedding designer, I often observe a lot of situations where I question whether or people are given the right advice when it comes to planning their celebration.

A discussion was brought up recently where a vendor mentioned that she thought it was okay, and advised a couple to charge for tickets to their wedding. She reasoned, that because the couple could not afford to cover all the costs (and didn’t want their guests to purchase registry items they already had), they should sell tickets to their wedding to cover all their related wedding expenses. The vendor mentioned that the couple only had enough money to cover a celebration for 200 guests, but invited 600 guests total via the wedding tickets route.

The problem with this is that people are so worried about throwing a lavish wedding, and seem to have forgotten about the meaning behind it all. I feel like it perpetuates a type of monster (bride/groomzilla) that we’d all like not to deal with.

In this day and age of living within ones means, I think it is highly irresponsible of the couple to even think of doing something beyond what they can afford, and unfathomable that a vendor would even make such a suggestion! (Let’s not forget this type of mentality is what caused the credit and housing market to implode.)

And as wedding vendors, we hold the responsibility of making sure the couples have realistic expectations of what they can and cannot fit into their budget, and we are the ones that help them work around that. For instance, I’d be happy to work within a couple’s budget for their invitations, and would assist them in alternatives if there is something I can do on my end. But it would be wrong of me to push something that they “should” do, just because everyone else thinks it’s the norm.

It really bothers me that the WIC (Wedding Industrial Complex) goes so far to push this “One Perfect Day” mentality, where it’s all about the showmanship of what the wedding looks like, rather than what it stands for. Some of the best weddings I’ve ever attended as a guest, are the ones that have chock full of meaning rather than everything in a perfect shade of coral.

That is not to say that a couple can’t have the wedding of their dreams, dress of her dreams, great food, fantastic wedding band, etc. But when the cake has been cut, and the last dance danced, what really matters is that the newlyweds celebrated the meaning of love and commitment that is true to them, not what society dictates to them as true.

What do you think? Take the quick poll.

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Responses

  1. I totally agree with you! Wow, tickets to a wedding. Why would you want 600 of your “closest” friends at your wedding anyway?

  2. Wow! I am in shock. I am with you, I too work within a clients budget and offer alternatives. I often tell them to skip the save the dates if it’s not over a holiday, not many out of town guests, or if it’s too close to receiving the actual invite.

    I was invited to an anniversary dinner party at a restaurant and had to pay for our own meal. I thought this was immensely tacky. If you can’t afford food for your guests don’t have it there or do something else instead. It’s like inviting friends over for dinner and asking them to pay for their portion.

  3. Tickets to a wedding? What is this, a lottery? I think some nice person/friend needs to tell this couple that it is a no-no so that they don’t get gossiped about later. Who is this lady in the wedding industry. Someone needs to tell her to stop give this strange advice.

  4. Tickets to a wedding? That is the tackiest thing I’ve ever heard. You are inviting people to celebrate your day not to dinner and a show.


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